The 'Good' in Goodbyes
by toughgirl13
Summary: Sam and Freddie have been dating for a year now but when they broke up, each of them had a hard time on coping up with it. So when Sam left and came back after months, both of them have to struggle with the feelings that should've been long forgotten.
1. A year before

******A/N: Okay! So this is another multi-chaptered story. I know the other one isn't even done yet but I don't know what to write in that story anymore. Sorry. But I promise you this: I will finish this story :) I really hope you like this. **

******Disclaimer: I don NOT own iCarly, obviously.**

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_A year before_

Everything was fine. I was fine. He was happy. _We _were happy. I've never felt so perfect. I've always thought that no one would like me. And there he was, asking me to be his girlfriend. Of course I'm not stupid so I said yes. I looked at the boy on the couch and smiled. He was holding a plate of ham, my favourite food. He just knows me too well.

"Give me thy ham, Fredwierd!" I said trying to mock Juliet since that topic from English is still somehow stocked on my mind and I don't find old poetry amazing.

"Why should I give this ham to thee, my princess?" He asked doing one of those old accent.

"Because thy princess is hungry and she must now have her food." I said sitting on the couch beside him.

"Well if you would allow me, can I feed my princess to make thy ham more delicious?" He smirked. I smiled and nodded. I opened my mouth as he placed bits of ham inside my mouth. He placed the plate on the table, cupped his hand on my face, and sighed.

"I love you so much" He smiled. I held his hands and said

"I love you too dork. Now if you don't feed me that ham this instant, I might be forced to eat you." I said laughing a bit. He chuckled.

"Happy to serve you, Puckett" He said picking up the ham.

"Happy to be served, Benson"

**Freddie's P.O.V**

I can't believe I'm here staying with the girl I love, Samantha Puckett. I know. Who would've thought that I would fall in love with the girl who tortures me on daily basis? I smiled as she finished the ham and placed her head on my shoulders. I smelled the strawberry scent of her hair as I brush my fingers into it. I heard the wonderful sounds of snoring coming from Sam. It's weird how you find perfections in the imperfections of the person you love.

I used to believe that I was in love with Carly. She was perfect. She was good, kind, generous, pretty, but boring. At first it'll be a thrill but then it got boring. Sam was just _Sam._ She's a mystery. She's impossible to figure out. She's random and she is the girl I love. I never realized it until Carly woke me up into realizing it. I can still hear her voice and exact words in my head.

'_Don't be stupid, Freddie. You like Sam and every time it hits you, you deny it. The realization of you being in love with her was so long ago. Remember? When you kissed her on the fire escape? You don't love me. If we get together it'll be plain boring.' _Those were the exact words she said. And that's when it hit me. It took me two months to take up the courage and ask Sam out. I still can't believe she likes me too. The thought of her being my girlfriend is something I never thought would happen.

Her head fell on my chest and I looked at her face. It was angelic. It was so peaceful. The total opposite of Sam when she's awake and full of energy. I chuckled.

"Fredward stop thinking about me." She said still eyes closed.

"How did you know I was thinking about you?" I asked defensively

"You chuckled. It's either me or you have another girl in your mind." She said opening her eyes while lifting her head to face me.

"You're right I have another girl in my mind" I smirked. She glared.

"I was kidding!" I replied laughing "Of course I'm only thinking of you." I continued. I gave her a peck on the lips. Man, I will never get tired of kissing this girl.

"I believe you" She smirked. Her facial expression changed. It was a mixture of wonder and hope. "Do you think we will last?" She looked into my eyes. I don't know what to say.

"I don't know what will happen next but like what I've said. I can't promise not to hurt you because I'm not perfect but I will try my best. We will make this last" I smiled.

"I hope" She replied resting on my chest again. I smiled

I remember the day I asked her out. ..

_Flashback..._

"_Okay since we're talking about freedom. I would like everyone to say something to anyone without being scare, even if it's for me. Now remember, you have the freedom to say anything you want to say. Now who wants to go first?" Ms. Briggs said._

"_Me!" Sam raised her hand. Ms. Briggs raised her eyebrow since it's an unusual occasion for Sam to recite._

"_Okay. Say whatever you want to say Ms. Puckette" She said anyways._

"_Ms. Briggs your bagpipe skill is suckish!" everyone laughed. I saw Ms. Briggs opened her mouth but immediately she closed it and nodded._

"_Okay. Who's next?" I sighed. Maybe this was the chance I've been waiting for, a chance to ask Sam out. I raised my hand._

"_Freddie" Ms. Briggs said nodding._

"_I would like to take this opportunity to.." I inhaled deeply "Tell Samantha Puckette that I like her. A LOT" I looked at everyone who's giving ohh's and ahh's and looked at Sam. _

"_So Sam, will you be my girlfriend?"_

"_Benson, I swear if this is a prank you better stop it!" Sam replied_

"_No Sam I swear! I really like you!" I defended my self "No! I don't like you! I LOVE YOU Sam! I really do!" She cut me with a kiss and after that everyone basically knew we we're together._

_End of flashback..._

I've always loved that day. I kissed Sam's forehead and smiled. I rubbed her hair and drifted to sleep.

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**So that's it... I know it's short but come on! It's the first chapter. LOL. I really hope you like it guys!**

**And if you do like it... please click that button saying 'review' I would really appreciate it.**


	2. The Final Breakup

**A/N: Yay! Chapter two! LOL! So this is where the drama begins! I really hope you'll like it! So yeah go ahead and read. I'm really speechless at the moment so yeah.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly.**

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_The Final Break Up_

"You know what? I'm tired of you and me fighting over and over again!" I said looking at the dork.

"Oh? You think I don't feel tired of this crap?" He replied.

"Crap? Oh so this is all a 'crap' for you?" I replied with pure anger.

"No" he sighed "I'm sorry. I'm just stressed and all" he replied. I was tired. I don't want us fighting over and over again. I want the old us. The one that's so carefree. The one when we used to tease each other, not fighting. I looked into his eyes. I know he was truly sorry but if I forgive him, if we keep on forgiving each other we won't learn. It'll always be like this. He held my hand. I pulled my hand away from his.

"Freddie,We need to break up" I grew a sudden interest on the flooring.

"But Sam, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say this was a cr—"

"It's not that Freddie. I just need time and space. We've been fighting a lot lately and I just.. I don't know." I looked at him. He was hurt. I don't want to see him this way but I don't want us to be like this forever. "Freddie, I love you, but this is what we need to do." I said.

"Why? This is not something we need. It will only hurt us. It won't make us better persons" He replied trying to convince me.

"Can't you see it? We've change. This is not us! Sure we used to tease each other but we never fought with each other." I said. The bell rang and the halls were empty. It was only him and me.

"I'm going to class now" I said. I saw his eyes watering up. I can't take it anymore so I had to walk away before I change my mind. I heard footsteps following me. He grabbed my hands.

"Sam, Please. Don't do this. I love you!" I wanted to kiss him. To hug him and forgive him but I can't, I won't. I have to do this. I walked away, leaving him alone.

**Freddie's P.O.V**

I can't believe it! I messed it up! Everything we've been through. Everything we've done has gone to waste. _'Do you think we will last?' _Those words are on replay in my mind. I ran once again after her. I went in front of her and blocked her way.

"Sam! Are you really willing to do this? You will just give up everything. All those times we've spent laughing. You can't just throw it away with one simple fight. You can't do this and I know you still love me. Sam please think about it." I said almost crying.

"No. Freddie you need to understand. Please just let me go. Let's just walk away from this relationship." How can she say that? How could she say that? It's too painful. She left once again and I just stood there alone. No one was there. This is the first time in my whole life that I've felt so alone. Like nothing really matters anymore. I stood there. It was very bright but I felt like I was in the dark. I ran. I ran outside. I ran towards home. My fist was clenched. As I entered the elevator I punched the wall. I don't care what happens. I love her so much it hurts. I just want to die. No, I am not going to kill my self but that's just what I feel. I opened the door and saw my mom in the kitchen. I walked pass her. I really didn't want to talk to anyone.

"Freddie" She said. I turned around. "I thought school won't end for another hour?" She continued. I nodded.

"And where is Sam?" My eyes once again became teary.

"We broke up. I don't want to talk about it mom. I'm going to my room" I ran to my room and locked the door. Tears ran down my face. I can't stop them from falling. I know this is something guys would not do but screw that thought! The love of my life just broke up with me and I do not know what else to do but cry although I know crying won't solve anything.

**Sam's P.O.V**

As always, I wasn't participating in class but this time it wasn't because I don't want to but because I'm too preoccupied. It still hurts. It really does. But if I didn't do that nothing will change. I just have to face the fact that I have to end it. I have to be brave enough for the both of us. I have to make the hardest decision so we could be better and grow up and if he's still the one I know we'll get back together but right now this is what both of us needs. Carly looked at me with a questioning look. I looked down. I really don't want anyone knowing about the break up for awhile. The bell rang and the school ended. I looked at Freddie's locker knowing Freddie might be there. Nope. I don't see him anywhere. He must've gone home. I sighed.

"Sam" I heard a familiar voice at my back

"Carly" I said facing her. "I just broke up with Freddie." I said crying. I hugged my best friend and cried on her shirt.

"Shh." She said rubbing her hands on my head trying to comfort me. I looked at her and she nodded. I knew she would understand. She knew me and Freddie. She knew we had a few break-ups due to small things but we always find a reason to get back together. She also knew that this time was different because this was the first time I ever cried.

"Maybe this is the best for the both of you. I know you love each other but sometimes you just have to move on to get back to life, to go and learn how to walk in your own feet again." She said. I nodded in response.

"Don't overstrain yourself okay?" She continued. I nodded.

**Freddie's P.O.V**

I should've kept my mouth shut. I never meant to say it that way. I love her for god's sake! I've never love any other girls like this. She was the best thing that has ever happened to me. Sure, I thought I was in love with Carly but it was just a mere infatuation. It was never love but with Sam it was something else entirely. I knew it was something better. I can't believe because of my stupid anger I pushed her away. I want to do something. I want to do something very romantic and just make her fall in love with me over again but nothing in my body was responding to whatever I was thinking. I just stay still not bothering to move.

I can't even lift a finger. I was paralyzed. I was crying. I was broken. I promised I would try my best not to hurt her. I promised I would make this last. That's all there is, _promises. _Promises that I've never kept. I want to keep those promises but it's just too late. She's gone. I tried to call her several times all of them went directly to her answering machine. I texted her several times and she won't reply. I called Carly and all she told me is that Sam didn't want to talk to me. I now know for sure that she doesn't want me back.

I tried everything. I even pinched and punched myself hoping this was all a dream and then I would wake up. Unfortunately this was the nightmare of reality and I could never wake up from it and all I can do is face the truth.

I want to take those words back. I want to take it all back. I want to go back to Sam. I want to go back to where it used to be. Back to those days when we we're actually happy, not like this. I wish we never changed. I know I'm wishing things I cannot change but I just wish she was right here, beside me. I wish she was here cuddling me. I wish she never said we're over. I wish she never said goodbye. Too many wishes and nothing have the possibility to happen right now. I looked at the window and saw the rain started pouring.

**Carly's P.O.V**

Sam walked home. She said she wanted to be alone. I totally understood. We walked on the opposite ways. I sill can't believe they broke up but I have to understand Sam's decision. I know Freddie would be upset but I knew this was better for the both of them. Love doesn't always end with a happy ending. Sometimes they need to be sad and hurt so you can learn something from it. I'm not saying I don't want them back together. All I'm saying is that they need this break to get better and as their best friend I know they're definitely going to get back together someday soon, I hope.

I heard the thunders and the rain poured. I opened my folded umbrella and started walking home.

I ignored the screaming doorman and went straight to our floor. I stopped my tracks between my and Freddie's apartment door. Man, if Sam's not taking this well I wonder what's happening to Freddie right now. I search for the key to my apartment in my bag. I got the key and as I was about to open our apartment door I heard a door opening behind me. I turn around and saw a worried looking Mrs. Benson.

"Carly? It's Freddie... You have to help me." She said in a worried tone. My eyes widened. What has he done now?

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**Okay so that's the end of chapter 2 I really hope you liked/loved it...but yeah. Love it. Hate it. Whatever just tell me how you feel about it XD. All you have to do is click that button saying 'review'. HAHAHAHA!**


	3. Wrong Decisions

**A/N: Okay! Here goes another chapter. I really hope you like this. I stopped studying just to make this chapter and exams are coming in a few days. Wish me luck! LOL! anyway so yeah this is the third chapter of this story! Weeeee!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly**

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Wrong Decisions_

Carly looked at Mrs. Benson with her heart beating a million miles per hour because of nervousness.

"Where is he? What happened?" Carly managed to say as calmly as possible.

"He's at the fire escape and he won't leave. He's...not sober." Mrs. Benson sighed. She never saw her son like this. Sure Freddie obsessed over Carly before but every time Carly turned him down he was always okay with it. She figured maybe her son would do the same to Sam. You know... just forget about what happened and don't lose hope. She regretted having to be divorced at this point in time; this is the moment when his son needed a father, someone who would understand and know what to tell him.

Carly looked at the window by the end of the hallway and noticed that it was raining. Lucky she got home before it started to pour heavier. It hit her head; if Freddie is out at the fire escape that would mean he's wet from the rain. She nodded and followed Mrs. Benson inside their house.

Neither of them didn't know what to do. They have never seen Freddie in such situation. He's clothes partly drenched in water. He has a wine bottle on his hand which he got from their kitchen cabinet. It was supposed to be use for cooking when the occasions come. He stands up and just started spinning then he saw Carly.

"Hey Carls!" he said in an unusually happy tone. "Have you talked to Sam?" He smiled.

"Do you think if I get sick she'll be worried and come back to me?" If you looked carefully, you'll see the sadness in his eyes. He wanted to cry again but he told himself he would not cry because Sam would think he's a wimp thus giving her a reason not to come back to him.

"Freddie don't be pathetic" Carly said trying to convince him to come inside.

"Come on, Carls. We just broke up. Maybe she still cares for me. If I get sick maybe..." He was cut off by the brunette inside his home.

"Oh for the love of god, Freddie! You think she broke up with you because she stopped caring? She broke up with you because she cared. A Lot. But you don't seem to notice that! She's doing it for the both of you even though it really pains her. She wanted to cry, she cried but she's willing to experience the pain for the betterment of your relationship!"

"You don't understand I—" He was again not given the chance to finish his sentence.

" No! It's you who doesn't understand! You know what? Fine. Stay there until you get sick but I swear I'll be the first person to stop Sam from seeing you." Carly said walking away. Mrs. Benson sighed seeing his son's expression of shock and hurt. She can't bear to see his son like this but Carly was right, so she nodded and left.

Freddie sighed and placed the unfinished bottle down. Maybe Carly was right but he can't just stop trying. Maybe this was not something he should do. Maybe there's something else he should do for her to take her back. Staying away from her was not an option. He can't do that. He can't live with that. It's too painful. He went inside the house and started taking a shower.

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The smell of the liquor was still present in his mouth. He's been lying on the same bed for hours just thinking about their relationship and what could've gone wrong. All the wrong decisions he has made, all the wrong decisions they have chosen. It was their fault it turned out like this but every time he thinks about it he always thinks it's his fault. He looked at the picture at the nightstand. Again, he felt his eyes watering up. He wanted to stop crying but sometimes he just can't help it; he just loved her too much. After a few more minutes he started drifting to sleep.

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He didn't want to go to school today. He didn't want to see her. So he never went out of the bed. He was sad like the first time his father left; he thought he would never feel the same thing he felt that day, the feeling of being alone. Boy, was he wrong. It's hurting him. He still didn't understand why they need to break up. They can just get some space and still be together but she chose to end their relationship; she chose to _give _up.

She never wanted to give up but she wanted to move on, to grow up but at the same time being her. If he's going through hell, she wasn't any better. For the first time in her lifetime she talked to her dad, she asked her mom to drive her to him.

**-**_**The same night Freddie got drunk-**_

"Mom?" Sam asked her mom who is currently bored watching the news. She looked at her daughter's puffy eyes.

"Honey, what's wrong?" She said putting the remote on the table and shifting her position to see her daughter's face more clearly.

"Can you drive me to dad's?" she asked and her mom gave her a look and nodded.

"You know honey if you have a problem you can just tell me. We don't have to go for a four-hour drive to your dad's"

"I just figured, maybe I should talk to him. I mean, I haven't talked to him since...I haven't talked to him at all. I don't remember talking to him at all"

"Okay, tell me what happened. I want to know before we go there"

"I broke up with Freddie and I just felt like I really need a father right now. I mean you were always there but sometimes I wish I had a father. The one who stays." Her mom's eyes are beginning to water and so were hers.

"Sweetie do you even remember your father's face?" Sam shook her head and her mom sighed as she went to the old photo album underneath the living room table. She took a picture of Sam's father and showed it to her.

"Remember when you we're younger I told you I can't look at your eyes because they reminded me of something?" She smiled "Well it wasn't something, it was someone, it was your father. Now I want you to stay here while I go get my coat and the car keys."

"Okay, mom"

Marie Puckett went upstairs. She did not know what exactly was she doing. She's taking a risk here. She might still be in love with him. They haven't seen each other since they got divorced. They're relationship was obviously falling apart. It went from them always cuddling and stuff to her throwing plates at him for going home late. She went to her closet and grabbed a coat. She grabbed the phone on her desk and dialled a familiar number that she hasn't dialled in years.

"Hello, David?" She said making sure it was his number.

"Marie?" Her heart was beating faster now

"Yeah, uhm, —"

"What's up? How are the kids?" He said. He waited years for her to call. He wanted her back but if she's happy he knew he had to let her go.

"Well Melanie's still in boarding school and Sam is still...Sam. Although..." She held that thought for a minute and David decided to talk.

"Why? What's up with Sam?" He asked with a hint of worry.

"She wants to see you" she said immediately

"Now?" He said

"Come on David, she really needs you" she replied.

"Okay" He said sighing.

"We'll be there in four hours" She said hanging up.

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**weeepeedooo! Yeah so I think you have an idea what's going to be on the next chapter. I really hope you like this guys :) I will really be motivated if you leave good reviews. Bad reviews will be accepted too. But just try your best to say it in the nicest way possible. LOL. So yeah!**

**P.S**

**Why you so stupeeeeeeehhhd?**

**P.P.S**

**WHY CAN'T HOBOS AFFORD CABLE? That's just unfair! No? Oh well.**


	4. Father and Daughter

**A/N: Sorry for the late update! I've been busy with school and the exams was last week so I really did not have time to write this and yeah a lot of homeworks and assignments to do and because I am a _very very very_ responsible student... I crammed :D anyway I hope you enjoy this. **

**Disclaimer: I don not own icarly**

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_Father and Daughter_

We were driving to my father's house. I don't know what's happening to me. I wanted to go home but at the same time I wanted to meet him and give him another chance. I know this isn't exactly like the saying "When one door closes another one opens" but still its close, right? So I asked my mom to drive me to his house probably reminding her of some memories she wanted to forget just because I broke up with Freddie. Is it a valid reason? No, I don't think so or maybe it is. So here I was, shifting uncomfortably on my chair while my mother's concentrated on the road. She told me I can get some sleep but the feeling of sleepiness never occurred to me. I looked at the street and saw the street passing by me or was it the other way?

The lights look like they're moving, colourful clubs with people dancing and the park where everyone makes out in. I've always been disgusted by that place. It's full of people making out and right now at this very moment I envy them for having the one they love beside them. My mom caught me staring at the window and gave me a comforting warm smile, her eyes still on the road. She placed her right hand on my lap.

"It's going to be okay sweetie" She said.

"I hope"

"Your father is a good man."

"Yeah? Then why'd he left us?" I asked my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I asked him to. Look sweetie, if you're not ready to face him yet I can always turn around" She looked at me for a brief second.

"No. I want to know him. I guess it's time to finally get to know him" I said.

"Okay, if you say so."

"Look mom, if you're not ready to meet him you don't have to stay. I can always find my way home" I smiled

"No way ! Sam It's a four-hour drive and you expect me to leave you?" She said. I shrugged

"Well, you can always stay in the car." I smiled

"Okay honey but right now you need to get some sleep. We still have two hours to go."

"Okay" I nodded and closed my eyes and drifted to sleep.

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"Sam? Honey we're here" My mom said shaking me. I fluttered my eyes open. I shifted my position and stretched.

"This is dad's house?" I said pointing a pretty nice house on my window. It was a blue house with a porch and a second floor. The garden was simple but nice. There was a light on the front porch and a light on what i think is the living room. He's probably awake. Maybe he knows I'm coming. How the hell did he knew that? Mom. I looked at her and sighed.

"Uhuh" She said nodding. "Now get up, go out there and knock on your dad's door" I nodded. I unlocked my seatbelt and went out. I looked back at the car and smiled at my mom. God I was so nervous. I entered the front porch and knocked on the door three times. If he does not answer after 5 seconds I'm running back to the car. One... Two... Three... Four... Five, that's it I'm gone. I was about to run back to the car when I heard a click and the door opened.

"Samantha?" I heard a very calm voice.

"Sam" I said still facing my back on the door. "Call me Sam" I continued

"Sam" He said. I turn around to face him. It was so familiar. Not only because I saw his picture 4 hours ago but because I remembered him carrying me, playing with me, smiling at me. I remember him because he was once with me. He looked different though. His hairs are starting to grow white. When he smiled you vividly see the wrinkles forming on his face. He does not look that old though, he still looked young despite of the aging things that you can see from him. My eyes are starting to water I wanted to hug him already but something tells me I should do something first; I had to ask him.

"Why'd you leave us?" I said staring at his blue eyes that reminded me of well... me.

"Why don't I answer that with a cup of coffee in your hand inside the house" He smiled and walked inside leaving the door open. I walked inside and went to the living room. It was small but nice, comfortable. I sat on the small couch uncomfortably while hearing noises from the kitchen. I looked around. There are a few pictures of us, me and mom, and him and Melanie. I saw a recent picture of me; perhaps Melanie gave it to him.

"So Sam, How are you? I've heard a lot about you! What's going on in your life? Tell me everything!" He said with joy.

"Answer me first, why'd you leave us?" I said with a serious tone. He sighed. He looked at me with those sincere eyes.

"It was for the better. Me and your Mom's relationship were falling apart. I was too busy with my job and I was having so much fun, I mean, it was my dream job, but I forgot I had a family. I still loved your mom but I can't believe I forgot how much I loved her when I got caught up with the job. So she told me it was better if we separate ways. She wanted space so I gave it to her. I don't want her to get hurt and be forced to stay with me if she didn't want to" So it wasn't the fact that he did not like me. It was because he loved mom and from what I can see he still love her, a lot.

It was at this point that I've decided to hug him. The hug was so familiar. I felt like I have my family back together again.

"Now you answer my question, what made you want to see me?" he said looking at me. I honestly do not know. I just wanted to see him, to meet him again.

"I have no idea" I said shrugging.

"Tell me what happened"

"I broke up with my boyfriend" I said looking down

"Tell me, why?" He said nodding

"We were turning like you and mom" I said

"Do really want this? Can you really let him go?"

"It's for the best"

"Even though it hurts you and it hurts him too?" He asked "Is it worth the pain?"

"Maybe" I sighed.

"David" I heard my mom's voice from the door. My mouth hanged open. What gave her the sudden courage to talk to him?

"Marie?" He said standing up. I can see he still love her and she still love him too.

"Can I use your bathroom? I really need to pee and trust me you don't want me peeing on your garden" She said crossing her legs. He nodded.

"Second door from the kitchen" He replied. She nodded and made a run for it.

"You still love mom" I said smirking

"That will never be changed" He replied

"So what happened? After you broke up?" I asked.

"I quit my job and find a new one"

"WHAT? WHY? I thought that was your dream job why would you quit it?" I asked

"Well it turned to my worst nightmare so I had to leave it" He said looking at the bathroom door then looked at me. We heard the bathroom door opened with my mom walking out.

"Do you have any cream soda?" My mom shouted form the kitchen opening the refrigerator.

"Yeah, top shelf" He replied.

"Okay! Thanks I'm going back to the car" She said walking away

"It's getting late I think you should go home" He said

"Yeah. It's really nice talking to you Dad" I said smiling. I hugged him one last time as he walked with me until the door. We waved our last goodbye and me and my mom speed off towards home.

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**That's it! Weeee! I hope you enjoyed it! I really hope you review cause I don't get paid for doing this but I enjoy doing it and your reviews makes me sooooo much happier!**

**HAHAHAHAHA! rant rant rant. And I i don't really get that much reviews for this story so yeah but still thanks for all the support!**


	5. Debate

**A/N: So yeah. There it is. the next chapter. I hope you like it! LOL. I was sick for a few days but i'm fine now! Man! there are a lot of things that are not allowed for me to do and to eat. It sucks! LOL anyway! I hope you enjoy this! R&R**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything.**

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_Debate_

It's been a month since we broke up and no, I don't think we're over it. The purpose of this break up was to move on, grow up, or at least go back to the way it used to be but it's not, It's nothing like it. Instead of getting better it's getting worse. Avoiding him was the last thing I wanted to do but I had to. I have to be able to handle this thing I've placed myself into. It's getting worse. I keep on looking at him during our classes together. He wasn't any better, he was reckless, he was something I never thought he would be, someone I never wanted him to be.

iCarly was at least something we did together. Yeah, when we broke up you might think iCarly will stop but iCarly was purely professional and besides even in rehearsals we did not talk, in fact he's not even there during rehearsals, well he was occasionally, but during those times he's late. Sometimes I wonder what he's doing, what he's up to. So why don't I just end all of this? You know get back together with him and just be happy again. Why can't I do that? Pride? Maybe. Hope? Perhaps. Maybe I am hoping that this would all get better or maybe it's both hope and pride.

I sat there with my right hand on my chin. I sighed. I do not know what to do. Maybe I could talk to him or maybe I can ask Carly to talk to him about it but... I don't know.

"Samantha!" A voice suddenly interfered my thoughts.

"Hey Mrs. Castillo. Geez, do you really need to shout?" I replied

"Unfortunately, with your head floating in the air it needs to be done."

"Okay." I said looking at my moralities teacher.

"So answer my question Ms. Puckett" She continued

"What question?" I asked

"You are given two choices; Something that will make you better but you will have to experience hardships along the way which may hurt someone or go the easy way and do nothing at all?" This question made me think. I looked at Freddie who's at the end corner of the classroom. His eyes were dull but he was looking at me with those sad eyes.

"I say" I sighed "We choose the other way, the harder way to get better. With that we can get better and be happier than ever. Sure, there are people who are going to get hurt but they should understand that we are not doing this for ourselves but also for them." I looked at my teacher as she smiled and nodded.

"Is there anyone who wants to contradict Ms. Puckett's answer?" She asked "Ms. Puckett please remain standing" I nodded. I saw a familiar hand in the corner.

"Freddie Benson" She said asking him to stand up.

"Don't you think it's unfair? You don't even know where that road is going. Are you sure it's for the betterment of you? Are you sure you'll be happy when you're at the finish line? Those people who get hurt along the way, you said that you cared for them, then why did you hurt them?" He said looking at me. My heart pounded really hard.

"So you're saying that you're just going to slack there and do nothing? Be like a sloth even when you notice there is something wrong? Life's always an adventure you will never know the ending until the journey is done and you will never know the ending if you never tried but you'll always know the ending of those who did nothing, they always end up with nothing." I replied

"Or maybe they could end up with everything in their hands. Maybe if those _adventurers _of yours would stop then maybe everyone would be happy. No one, not even you, would get hurt" He said. I saw everyone looking around awkwardly. They know this was getting personal but I didn't mind them. I was too busy with my pride.

"Hurt is the thing that makes us human, Freddie. We're pained because we love and sometimes it's because we loved too much or maybe it's because we loved the wrong person" I saw his eyes saddened. I didn't mean it that way. It wasn't supposed to come out like that. Before I could even explain myself and before he could even talk the bell rang and I just ran out of the classroom.

I regret what I said. I wanted to eat my words, take it all back but I can't. It's not like I have super powers and I can turn back time. I walked to the bathroom and splashed my face with some cold water. I looked in the mirror and saw my panting face. I grabbed some tissue to wipe on my wet face and went outside the restroom. That's when I saw him standing by the stairs. I avoided his eyes and went straight to my locker. I can feel him following me but I was still trying to remain unnoticed. I turned around only to be faced by a pair of brown eyes that I love the most. My heart pulsed faster.

"Sam, Please tell me you did not mean it" It was so different to hear his voice again to hear him say something again, words other than: "in five, four, three, two, one" or "And we're clear". The first few real words he told me after that day.

"Look Freddie, Let's be professional here, whatever I said there it was for the debate. Don't take all those things personally." I said trying to get away but again he blocked my way.

"Then you did not mean it. Those things you said, specially the last part. Sam, It's only been a month maybe we can work this out. You know be happy again. Whatever reason you had I know it's not worth it. I mean look at us? Are we getting any better?"

"Freddie, come on, it's not worth it. You deserve someone so much better. I do not deserve you, I do not deserve someone as good as you."

"Don't say that" He said looking deeply into my eyes.

"Can't you see? We're not compatible." I told him.

"You're right, I don't see it. How can we not be compatible? We're like magnets, we may be the complete opposite of the other but we definitely are completely attracted to each other" He said wearing a goofy smile. I raised my eyebrows.

"Seriously Freddie? Save your ego Fredward before it gets dumped." I said smirking and went to my next class. Once again he blocked my way.

"Okay just give me one day to set things right and if you still don't want me back I would totally understand. I promise after tomorrow if you don't want me back we can go back to whatever we were doing I swear." He said. I sighed. I know him. He wouldn't give up once I entertained him. So I nodded.

"Okay. Just one day."

"One whole day "He said.

"And you swear if this doesn't work out you we will go right back to the way we were?" I said raising my eyebrow.

"I promise "He replied. I rolled my eyes

"Don't cross your fingers Freddie" I said crossing my arms.

"Pfft... I wasn't crossing my— there wasn't— I didn't... well yeah pffft" He said raising both his hands.

"Pick me up at six" I smiled walking to my next class.

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**So yeah! I hope you like it! I really hope for more reviews! LOL! I'm not demanding it though! XD not pressuring you or anything.**

**HAVE A HAPPY LIFE! LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH. Review. :D**


	6. Another Chance

**A/N: Hello there! So here's another chapter for this story! LOL. So this week is exam week and it sucks! pfft. LOL. Its not like I study our previous lessons before exams. Well I do... sometimes... Well, yeah, I hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it. Did I enjoy writing it? Yeah I DID! or maybe not that much... hmm...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly**

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Another Chance_

**12 months and 16 days ago...**

"Sam! How do you get to plan our first date? I'm the guy; I should be the one planning this!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Because I know you! I know you'll be planning a dinner in a garden with violinists and roses all over. It's so cliché." Sam replied. Freddie has to give in to Sam's condition so they could have their first official date. That time when he asked her out, she said that she won't go unless she plans the date.

"That's not what I had in mind!" He defended himself.

Sam gave him a look that clearly says "seriously?"

"Okay! That's probably what I had in mind, but c'mon Sam. I promise not to make it too cliché." He begged.

"Too late, we're already here!" She said. He looked around. What isn't cliché about an ice skating rink? Half of the population are lovers! Doesn't that make this date cliché, too? Freddie gave Sam a confused look.

"Ice skating? You don't think this is cliché, Sam?" He asked.

She thumped him in the head, talking at the same time. "Who said anything about us ice skating? Go grab some popcorn nub nuts. I'm going to get us a good front row view." Freddie raised his eyebrow but obeyed Sam's orders. Meanwhile, Sam was looking for the perfect place to sit on. Freddie came back with a huge bag of popcorn on one hand and two sodas balancing on the other.

Sam raised her eyebrow. "And you expect us to share only one bucket of popcorn?" She asked. Freddie glared.

Sam smiled and said, "I was just kidding!" giving him a peck on the lips.

"So what are we going to watch, Figure skating, Ice hockey?" He looked at the rink.

"Nope," She smiled. "We're going to watch them." She smirked. And Freddie scrunched up his eyebrows in confusion.

"Just watch, Fredwierd" She said and suddenly began laughing "Look at that dude with his girlfriend! He doesn't even know how to skate! Oh, man! They're both gonna crash in 5… 4... 3... 2... BAM!" Sam erupted in laughter, leaving Freddie to continue looking for the unfortunate couple.

He finally spotted them, and Freddie watched the couple that Sam, his girlfriend (it's still surreal to call her that), was still bellowing about and laughed along with her. He searched for someone else to laugh at and found a guy in a violet t-shirt who's dancing around. Well, he wasn't really dancing around, but more accurately, he was trying his best not to fall.

"Hey Sam, look at that guy!" Freddie said, pointing to the guy.

"Where?" She said still chuckling.

"That dude—the one with the violet t-shirt!" He said.

Sam's eyes beamed. She was trying not to laugh just yet, but just as she was about to say something, the guy fell down face first. Sam and Freddie doubled up in murderous fits of laughter.

"Now _that_ was epic!" Sam said, still chuckling. Without meaning to, she started laughing again. This time Freddie just watched her. He was so happy to have this girl beside him. He was so lucky. It was only seconds before her contagious laughter affected him as well. He found himself laughing with her again.

He thought he was going to regret this day. He thought he was going to regret letting her plan for their first date, but it was the complete opposite. In fact, he was glad that she planned it. It made him realize that this is the place he wanted to be— with her. No matter what, whatever happens, he wants to stay by her side.

And besides, if he plans the date, he will probably overdo it, just like what Sam said.

**Present**

"Do you think I'm overdoing it? You know, with all the roses and chocolates?" Freddie asked, wearing something dorky.

"Dude! Do you want us to tell you the truth?" some brown headed guy said, looking at the guy with black curly hair.

Freddie nodded.

"Jonah, you tell him"

Jonah nodded but then his eyes widened. "Wha- why me? Shane you do it!" Shane rolled his eyes while Freddie gave them a worried look. Shane sighed.

"Fine," Shan sighed. "You're kinda overdoing it" He said, shrugging.

"Yeah dude. I mean, can't you try to not overdo it?" Jonah butted in.

"Well, I'm winning a girl back, so shouldn't I at least—"Freddie's words were cut by Jonah before he could even finish.

"Dude you look like an obsessed geek stalker trying to win over a girl that will never even notice you! Look at what you're wearing!"

"Isn't that's what he is?" Shane said, looking at Jonah. Jonah chuckled.

"Thanks for the lift up Shane, that really made me feel better." Freddie gave him a sarcastic smile. He turned his back on them both and rubbed his neck. "What should I do?" He asked, facing them again.

"Well first, hand me those roses." Shane said as Freddie gave him a confused look but still handing over the flowers.

Shane picked the three most beautiful roses in the bunch and tied it with a white ribbon.

"Only bring these three roses, and please Freddie—_please__—_bring only one of those three boxes of chocolate. What'd you think Sam is, a pig? Geez," Shane said.

"And Freddie, please change your clothes; like seriously, it makes me want to puke." Jonah added.

"Okay, fine I'm going upstairs." Freddie said, climbing up two steps at a time and heading over to his room.

**At Shay's apartment**

"Carly, don't you think this is a little bit over the top?" Sam said as she studied herself in the mirror.

She was wearing a red dress that was tight fitting, showing off her curves. The mascara and eyeliner complimented the colours of her eyes, making them shine.

"Over the top? No! Heavens no! If it's Freddie, I definitely think he'll go for something super sweet and extra cliché." She said fixing my hair. Carly gave the curls of Sam's hair a little more volume and fixed her dress trying to make her body look curvier than the usual.

"Seriously Carly, what if you're wrong?"

"Trust me!" Carly said, adding the final touch. "There! You're prettier than an actual princess." She continued.

"Okay, I'm going outside for some air. Talk to you later!" Sam said, walking out of Carly's room. _Argh! Dammit I hate this shoes, it's so uncomfortable, _Sam thought. She walked downstairs and stepped outside. She looked at the apartment. She sighed as she decided to knock.

"Jonah, Shane? Is Freddie there? If he isn't, then please answer the door." She waited a few seconds before she said "_NOW_," a little louder.

Inside the apartment, Jonah and Shane exchange looks and shrugged as Shane opened the door. Jonah and Shane's jaw dropped as they saw the make-overed Sam.

"You're..." Shane started.

"Hot..." Jonah finished.

"Wow" They said in unison. Sam rolled her eyes.

"Look, Do you think I'm... you know… over dressing?" Sam said and they nodded.

"I think you should make the dress shorter" Jonah said, still looking hypnotized. She noticed Shane giving her the same look. Sam thumped them both in the heads.

"Why are you Freddie's friends again?" Sam said, glaring at them. "And I thought you were still scared of me," She said, looking at Jonah. "You too, Shane."

"W-well yeah we are, but you know, we're guys and we're teenagers so..." Shane said. Once again, Sam thumped his head.

"Anyway," Sam said emphasising the word. "Am I over-dressing or not?"

"Well, we've already answered that just awhile ago, but to make you happy I'll answer again: yes you are." Shane replied. "I don't think Freddie is planning on something cliché so I think you should go and dress to your best, yet _normal_ clothes." Shane smiled.

"But if you ever consider not going out with Fr—"

"Shut it Shane." Sam said, walking back to Shay's apartment. As she went inside, she marched directly to Carly's room.

"I _am_ over doing it." Carly gave Sam a confused look. "I went to his apartment and those two dorks told me it's nothing formal, so I _am_ over doing it."

"You went to his apartment?" Carly said with wide eyes.

"Well yeah," Sam replied, trying to act casual and not at all embarrassed.

"Ugh! Fine, go change your clothes, but please wear something nicer. Here, I'll pick one for you." Carly said.

She picked some pretty random clothes and made Sam try it all out until Carly finally settled for one that she thought was perfect. She chose something that was still Sammish yet still matching with her hairdo and make up. _What?_ Carly didn't want to waste the efforts she gave on Sam a couple of hours ago.

And so six o'clock came and Carly still isn't a hundred percent satisfied with what she did, but it's too late to change it. Freddie was already there.

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**So yeah there's another part for this... I hope you liked and enjoyed this.**

**If you enjoyed this chapter, press "Review". If you did not, press "Review". If you do not care, please click the "x" button and go burn in hell you effin' biatch. (This was said using that telecom girl's voice)  
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	7. Another Chance:The Date

**A/N: So here's the next chapter for this story. I really hope you'll like it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Read & Review. This chapter has been edited. I added a preview at the bottom. :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly**

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Another Chance: The date_

I was walking down stairs. I have no idea what he was planning. I walked down stairs smiling at him. He was smiling his signature smile. He was just..._Freddie._ He wasn't trying to dress up like someone else nor was he trying to impress me with bringing lots and lots of flower.

"Hello dork!" I said smiling

"Bully" He said handing me three pieces of roses and a box of chocolate. I grabbed it and smiled as I raised my eyebrow.

"You are not going to ask me to carry this the whole date are you?" I said lifting both items.

"No! Of course not. You can leave it here and then just take it later." He said defending himself. I nodded and placed the roses and chocolates on the counter top.

"C'mon?" I asked.

"Yeah!" He said. He smiled and looked at my hands and before I even had the time to react he placed his hands in mine holding it firmly as if he never wanted to let it go. Although he was holding my hands securely, I never felt uncomfortable by it. I feel _complete? Secured? _Yeah... I feel secured. So instead of following my first instinct which was to let go of his hands, I did the other way around, I held it tighter and I can see him smiling from the corner of my eyes. He looked into my eyes those piercing brown eyes looking into my soul. Okay that just sounded weird, even in my head.

"So?" I asked

"Where'd you want to go?" He asked.

"I thought you planned the date"

"I did. I just want to make sure you don't want to go somewhere else." He said smiling.

"Actually, I want to go to Paris, meet a guy named Philip and make you hate Disney land" I said with a smile.

"Ha-ha-ha." He replied sarcastically while I laughed, still not letting go of his hands. "I missed you" He said after laughing with me. He gave me a polite smile. I smiled back but didn't reply to his remark. What if this night didn't work out? I don't want to take the risks. He nodded knowing what that smile went.

"Of course! You don't want to take the risk, right?" He asked. I nodded

"So what are we going to do?" I asked excitedly.

"We are going to do something we haven't done in a while" He smirked

"Make out?" I teased

"Well, I would love that but that's impossible at the moment. Am I right?" He said chuckling. I released a small laugh and nodded. He then dragged me to somewhere familiar. I smirked at the memory.

"Of all the places, you picked this one?" I asked smilling. "You must have loved that day" I continued.

"I've always loved that day." He said replying with a smile "But haven't you noticed? There are no people at the rink" He said scrunched up his eyebrows. Either he's confused or pretending to be confused _or _he wants me to guess why there are no people there. I gave him a confused look. He smiled. _NO WAY..._

"You rented the whole ice skating rink?" I replied shouting. What? I think it's awesome and sweet that he did that. He nodded smiling.

"Where'd you get the money?" I asked

"Long story short, I borrowed from my dad plus the money I saved for the past few years." He smirked. "And I know how much you love ice skating and how much you hate it when someone gets in your way while doing it. Probably the reason why you were banned from most of the ice skating rinks in Seattle" He continued. I chuckled

"Well, what are we waiting for? Come on! Let's skate." I thought I saw him hesitated but I shrugged it off. Maybe it was just my imagination. I went to the guy who gives the skating shoes. I asked him for the shoes that would fit me and Freddie. Once we got the shoes I dragged him to one of the benches to change our shoes. It was then I saw Freddie still not changing his shoe.

"Uhmm. Freddie? Why aren't you changing?" I asked.

"Promise me you won't laugh." He said hesitating

"No promises" I teased

"Sam!" He begged

"Okay fine, I won't laugh" I said smiling innocently. He sighed.

"I don't know how to skate" He looked down in embarrassment. Truthfully, there was nothing to be embarrassed about but taking your date in an ice skating rink to skate while you don't know how is pretty funny on my book. I bit my lip trying not to laugh.

"You promised not to laugh!" He said.

"I said I _won't_. I didn't promise not to" I said laughing a bit. "No wonder you never wanted to have a date _on _the rink." I continued

"But you got to admit, laughing at other's ice skating is pretty funny" He said.

"Which makes you a hypocrite" I said laughing. He rolled his eyes.

"You made me do it!" He said defending himself

"C'mon, Fredward. Get in those skates and I'll teach you how to skate" I said smiling at him.

Three hours passed by. Half of the time was spent laughing at Freddie for falling and the other half was spent on me teaching him. It was a fun time and I wouldn't deny that. We we're stop by the guard saying our time is up and Freddie just paid for three hour reservation.

"I totally forgot about that" He said from the ground. His hand behind him was touching the ice. He laughed. I gave him a hand which he gladly took.

"Are we going home now?" I asked. I honestly didn't want to go home so I was expecting him to say something other than the dreaded answer.

"Nope" He smirked. I mentally sighed in relief. "I have one last surprise for you" He said.

"Surprise me" I replied.

He led me to the rooftop of the Bushwell plaza which was surprisingly nice. I was impressed with the view and all. There was a dinner setup in the middle of it. I knew this would happen, Cliché dinner. Of course this is Freddie. What do you expect? I don't mind having a cliché date. It's good once in a while. You know, the feeling of romantic thingy.

"You set this up?" I asked looking at him

"Yeah" He said shyly.

"It's nice" I said. His eyes widened.

"You actually liked it? You actually like a cliché dinner like this?" He looked at me as if he had seen a ghost or worse, his mother's underwear. I laughed mentally at the comparison.

"Well yeah, It's good once in a while" I said. He then led me to my seat. He then went to his seat and we started to eat. The food had this familiar taste and instantly I knew it was Fredward Benson's cooking. I swear this guy can cook. After eating he asked what seemed like an odd question at first.

"Do you want to dance?" I raised my eyebrow. First, there's no stereo or any music sources around and second, well, I don't know what's second. I just want to explain something in bullet form.

"But there's no music" I replied. He raised his index finger and revealed the speakers hiding underneath the table cloth. I laughed. He showed me his iPod and plugged it in.

"Now, do you want to dance?" He said smirking. I nodded. He led me to the "dance floor" and we started a slow dance. He then started leaning down. I wasn't doing anything. I was frozen. I wasn't sure if I should be doing this. If I should be kissing him but there was no time to think. He pulled me into a passionate kiss. Our lips were moving in sync. I was carried away. I felt like I was flying then suddenly there was this feeling, the feeling that this wasn't right, that I wasn't the right girl for him, and that what I did before was wrong. I shouldn't have been asking for the old us. It was about improving the new us. I realized that the problem wasn't him. The problem was _me_. I stopped kissing him.

"Freddie" I said leaning my forehead unto his. My breath was panting and so was his. "I'm sorry" I continued as my breath stabled.

"What do you mean?" He said moving his face away from me.

"I'm sorry for what I've put you through. I'm sorry for being stupid. I'm sorry for just realizing that the problem wasn't us but me. I'm sorry for just saying sorry every time I commit mistakes. I'm sorry" I said with tears falling down my face. He hugged me.

"It's okay Sam" He said patting my back. "It's okay" He said with his calm voice.

"Freddie. I'm leaving" I don't know why I said that. The idea just came in my mind and I instantly knew I had to do it.

"You mean like _leaving_?" he asked. I nodded.

"Why?" he said coldly.

"Because I need to find me. Freddie, I love you. I really do but I can't love you without thinking, wondering, that maybe if I was better, if I took this chance to find myself then maybe I can love you with the whole me, the true me, the me that you've loved not so long time ago." I said. He nodded with sad eyes. I kissed his forehead and left.

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_The first kiss stole the breath form my lips, why did the last one tear us apart?-kids in love. THE MAINE._

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**So yeah. Here's the chapter. Oh and there is a little shout out for musicfreak291's story, ije t'aime. I love that story. One of the best ones I've every read in . :)**

**Now I know, some of you may have heard the problem our country's facing right now. On behalf of all the Filipinos out there, I would like to raise my voice and apologize to our friends in Hong Kong, China, and Korea. It wasn't our fault. We couldn't control Mendoza from doing it. We were nervous too. We were even praying for the safety of _your _countrymen. We know that this event might change your view about us but please, don't stereotype us. Not all of us are like that sick bastards, Mendoza. The situation was out of control and we're so sorry. I just hope you would understand us. So for all the racist, LAY OFF, it's not like we wanted it to happen and for those who understand and hopes for the betterment of our country, THANK YOU.**

**Read&Review.**


	8. The New Lab Partner

**A/N: Hola! so here's another chapter. Read and review. Oh and thanks for all those who are supporting this story. LOL. Anyway, ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer: is use in fanfiction, a sort-of legality placed at the beginning of each chapter. It states that the fandom doesn't belong to the author of the fanfic, in short it means I DO NOT OWN iCarly.**

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_The New Lab Partner_

Today was the day. Today was the day Sam's leaving. I was contemplating if I should go or not. At first I didn't want to go. I've been avoiding her the whole week. I know that was a stupid idea. I thought it would lessen the pain of her moving away. But I knew it would hurt me more if I couldn't even talk to her before leaving. So here I was, driving to the airport. I ran inside. Five more minutes thank god. I saw her almost leaving and then I yelled her name; "Sam!" She turned around smiling.

"I thought you wouldn't come" She said as I was walking towards her.

"I thought I wouldn't go as well" I said

"Well it's a good thing you did because I will hate you forever if you didn't" She smiled.

"Good luck" I said smiling genuinely. "Find her and when you do, please tell her I want her ass back here as soon as possible because the old Freddie would be waiting." I said smiling.

"I will" She smiled. I pulled her into a hug. "I'll miss you" I said in her ear.

"The feeling's mutual, Benson" She replied. I didn't want to let her go but I have to. I watch her walk away. She didn't look back. Once she was out of sight I felt someone tapped me on the shoulder. I looked over and saw the brunette that I haven't talked to that much in the past.

"You okay?" She asked. I faked a smile and nodded. Was I suppose to be okay? She gave me a weak smile.

"You wanna hang out for a while? I'll invite Shane and eck.. Jonah" She said. I rolled my eyes.

"Get over it Shay It's been ages" I replied with a small laugh. She laughed.

"Okay, okay." She replied

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The bell rang. I sighed not wanting to go to my next class. The only thing that made biology interesting was Sam and now that she's gone it'll be plain boring. I walk lousily to the classroom. I went to my lab table and sat on the chair. I lay my head down.

"Good morning class" Mr. Henning said "Since we lost a student in our class, Freddie you are going to have a new lab partner" I looked at him with a bored expression and sighed.

"Class please meet..." I was totally lost in Mr. Henning's words when I saw the one who came in.

"Freddie?" She asked.

"Holy Crap!" I said aloud and everybody looked at me. Well that's convenient. I didn't mean to say that out loud.

"Well that wasn't the reaction I was looking for but that'll do" She said.

"Kaleen? What are you doing here? I thought you were in Barcelona!" I said. Kaleen was my friend. Well, she still is but we kind of grew apart. She was my childhood friend but then her mother got a job in Barcelona so they've decided to move. They used to live at the apartment right above ours.

"I see you already know each other. May we proceed?" He asked and well nodded as Kaleen sat right next to me.

"So how's Barcelona?" I asked.

"It was awesome but I love America better" She said with a smile. She looked at Mr. Henning as he started the class. I just kept staring at her. No, that doesn't mean I _like _her. It's just that I am shocked that she's back without even telling me. I mean, sure she hasn't contact me in years but I at least appreciate it if she tried and tell me she's coming back.

"Face the teacher, Mr. 'I-would-like-to-stare-at-you-all-day'" She said smiling nudging me. I chuckled. Truthfully I wasn't even staring at her. I was staring at her blonde curly hair that reminded me so much of Sam. I know she's nothing like Sam. Brown eyes, sweet yet blunt, the only thing that she resembles with Sam is her hair. Sam's hair is what I love the most, well after her blue eyes and standing so close to another blondie makes me think that she's Sam and I just can't help but glance at her once in awhile making sure she isn't. Finally the class finished and I stood up arranging my stuff.

"So Freddie, Is that your girlfriend over there? She's either glaring at me or glaring at you" She said looking at me but pointing at the door. I looked over there hoping to see Sam but no, it was Carly and I know that look she's giving. With those glaring eyes which meant '_date that girl a week after Sam leaves and I am going to kill you'_, I gulped loud enough for Kaleen to hear.

"Tell her the truth. I mean, I didn't know you have a girlfriend" She said. I chuckled

"She's not my girlfriend" I said

"Crazy stalker?" She asked. I laughed.

"No"

"Ex-girlfriend then?"

"No, well yeah, we dated before but it wasn't going to work out so we decided to break up." I said explaining. "She's my friend, and that glare either means I did something wrong or I might do something wrong and she's going to kill me if I did." I continued.

"Okay then" She said a little confused.

"Well, I have to go and head to my next class" I said smiling "How about we see each other later, at lunch? That is if you don't mind sitting with us." I continued

"Sure. I'll meet you in front the cafeteria" She said leaving and I went to Carly's direction who was giving me a mean look.

"Okay, First of all what are you doing there? And second are you spying on me?" I asked

"Excuse me?" She asked in defence "I was trying to see on how you are coping up with things but then I saw you with another girl so I guess you are unbelievably fine" She said walking away.

"Are you saying you want me to act the way I did before?" I asked while trying to catch up with her. She glared. "Look, Kaleen is—"

"So that's the bitch's name" She said glaring. I rolled my eyes

"She's not a bitch, Carly" I said. She stopped her feet from moving.

"Oh, so now you're defending her" She said crossing her arms.

"No! Carly would you just let me explain?" I told her. She sighed.

"Kaleen's my childhood friend. She went to Barcelona when we were five and now she's back and I'm just making her feel, _you know, _ comfortable." I explained myself. She nodded.

Carly sighed "I'm sorry I judged you."

"It's fine. I understand." I said. "You don't mind if she joins us at lunch, do you?" I asked

"Nope" She said walking to her locker.

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**So, what'd you think about Kaleen? heheehehe. I hope all of you enjoyed this chapter. You did? Then press that review button and win an imaginary cookie that'll make those who didn't review drool :) **


	9. Airport

**A/N: Hello ;) hahhahaha! Okay. Hello my dear readers. This is the shortest chapter yet to be released. Mr. Writer's block has been bugging the hell out off me. HNNNNG. haha for those who knows what that means, give me the link to your page and I'll give you mine. LOL.**

**Disclaimer: Me? owning iCarly? Yeah right. I'll add that to my list of things that will never happen.**

_

* * *

_

_Airport_

So he asked me to look for a tough looking blonde. It was the first day of summer and this is what he decided to do? I swear if I didn't like him I would've cursed him really hard. He stayed by the entrance, looking for whoever-she-is by the lobby while I was searching for another possible exit. It wasn't until a few seconds until my phone rang.

"Kaleen? Did you find her?" Freddie's worried voice said.

"Nope" I said, still surfing the crowd.

"Geez, what's taking you so long?" He asked. I rolled my eyes although I know he probably can't see me.

"Like you've found her yet" I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Just keep searching"

"There is a lot of tough looking blonde's in here. Can't you be more specific?" I asked, putting my right hand on my waist.

"Well, She's curly and when you go up to her she'll probably say something mean to you" He said.

"Like what? She'll say 'hi'" I asked.

"No! Just go look for her" He said, hanging up the phone.

I sat on the bench nearby trying to look for a blonde girl with a tough personality and a curly hair. I sighed. This is a suicidal mission. I can barely see a curly blonde in here how am I suppose to— wait. Did Freddie mean... _me? _ I mean he said he's looking for a blonde, I'm a blonde, with curly hair, I _have _curly hair, and a tough looking personality. Judge me all you want but I think I was the one he was talking about. Yes, I am blunt like that. I mean, it would've been easier if he just showed me a picture but nooooooo , all he did was tell me to look for this girl and could that girl possibly be _me?_ I gladly stood up from my seat and went to the direction where he was.

I picked up my phone and called him. "I found her" I said as soon as he picked up. He looked at me as I was almost near him.

"Me too" He replied looking in front of him and hanging up the phone. I looked at what he was looking at and my heart sunk. I should've known better. I should've known it wasn't me. This is what I hate about myself, I expect too much. I had no idea why, but I placed my arms around his and looked at the girl he's staring at. I could tell that she was shocked about my actions. I was too.

"Uhmm..." Freddie said, looking at me. I smiled, pretending to be confused.

"Oh" I said, untangling my arms from his. "Hi, I'm Kaleen" I said, offering my hands. She just smiled.

"Nice to meet you" She said, not bothering to shake my hands. She looked at Freddie, raising her eyebrows.

"How'd you know I was coming home?" She asked, smirking at Freddie.

"I didn't, I just followed a hunch" He said, smiling at her. I almost wanted to snort. I am not one to judge but c'mon, gimme a break. I've been crushing on Freddie since like after the day I got back.

"So is she—"Before she even finished her sentence a man running with his suitcase and handbag came to call her.

"Sam! God! It's hard to catch up on you! What if I get lost in here, what am I going to do?" He said, catching his breath.

"I told you to hold your pee and pee later." She said rolling her eyes.

"I'm sorry that I can't help it when my bladder's full!" The guy replied. Freddie gave them a confused look. I can see there's a hurt look in his eyes. Sam once again looked at us.

"Um, guys this is Vic, Vic meet Freddie and Kaleen" He waved at us and we waved back. I knew Freddie won't ask what's with them so I decided I should go and do the honours for him.

"So are you two—" I started.

"Do you want to hang out at the Groovie Smoothies?" Freddie said with a low chuckle interrupting me. He gave me an '_I think I already know what they are, please don't make me cry' _look.

"Uhh, Sure" Sam said, a little confused. It was then that it was as if she noticed something.

"Freddie," She said.

"Yeah?"

"Where's Carly?" she asked

"She's at Yakima, visiting her granddad but I guess she'll be home by tomorrow or something" Freddie replied.

"Oh, okay. Well can you let us drop off our stuff in her house for awhile? I already texted her"

"Sure" Freddie replied. We took the cab going to the Bushwell Plaza. Man, this is going to be a long day.

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**So. What'd you think? C'mon. Don't just sit there! Review! The slightest thought that comes into your mind are acceptable. example? okay, here is an example;**

**'OMG! I love BACON!'**

**or**

**'hi'**

**LOL. Okay. live, love, review and lol.**


	10. Airplane

**A/N: Hello there. I know I haven't updated in awhile but I have the perfect reason. I've been caught up with the projects and exams and I've been sick for a week. I even thought it was dengue but thank God it wasn't. It was a really high fever though. I guess I just got the sickness from my other sick classmate but whatever, I am here now so YAY!**

**Disclaimer: When the dessert floods and the grass turns blue, I'll probably own iCarly but since it's not then I guess I am not the owner of this show.**

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* * *

Airplane_

I watch her fast asleep in her seat with the clouds at her background. I smiled. I don't even remember when I started falling for her. She's just, different from all the other girls in school. She's spontaneous; she doesn't care about fashion, she's wild and tough but then at times you'll see a soft side of her. The only reason I am with her is because her aunt won't allow her to go home all alone and my parents are out of town.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer" Said the girl on the next column beside us as she read her magazine.

"Excuse me?" I asked looking at the girl with short black hair and purple highlights.

"Well, you've been looking at your girlfriend for like a long time now. Why'd you take her to Seattle anyway? It's not really a good place for summer outing." She said setting her magazine down looking at me.

"First of all, she's not my girlfriend and second, she's visiting her family and friends so I was forced to come here because her aunt doesn't want her to come home alone." I replied.

"But you like her don't you?" She said. "Look, I didn't mean to pry but really, you are looking like an obsessed maniac" She said smiling and then looking at the front of her seat.

"I'm not really the type to mingle with other people's business but I'll be giving you a tip for this girl: Don't stare. There are two different types of staring, one is stalker-ish type and the other one is the one that makes girls feel all pretty. I personally don't like either of those and base on her clothing I don't think she's one of those girls either" She said looking back at me. I gave her a low chuckle.

"Why do you care anyway?" I said in a very gentle manner and not in any way rude.

"I don't, just saying." She said raising her arms in defence still with that smile plastered on her face.

"Please fasten your seatbelts; the plane is about to land" Said a female voice that was heard over the speakers. With that Sam woke up and fastened her seatbelt.

"I smell bacon" She said. I sniffed and did not smell any.

"I don't smell any" I replied looking at her.

"Hmm" She said wondering "It probably means you are going to buy me a bag of bacon." She said

"You are so lucky I like you" I replied smirking

"Vic, I told you—" I stopped her by nodding

"I know" I said

The plane landed and we went out of the plane. I looked at Sam and saw a hint of joy, nervousness and hesitation in her eyes. It was as if she wasn't sure if she should be back to this place. I thought we were here to visit her mom but I can't wait to unfold some stories that I am sure this place is holding for her. She never told me anything about her past but right now I have this feeling that my bladder's full and that I really need to pee.

"Sam" I said which came out like a whisper.

"What?" She hissed

"I need to pee" I replied

"Pee later" She said as she started to walk.

"But my bladder is really full and I just can't. Gah! I need to pee!" I said running to the bathroom. After using the comfort room I saw her again, that girl from the plane.

"Hey it's you!" I said running up to her.

"What do you want?" She asked straight forward

"Well first, your name" I said. It would be nice to call her formally by name.

"I wouldn't tell you that. You're a stranger. Just call me 'the Airplane girl'. You know when you tell someone about the airplane incident, just go and call me 'the airplane girl'." She said trying to walk away from me.

"You know what?" She said turning around.

"What?" I asked and I noticed that her eyes were blue, a rare combination for someone with a black hair like her.

"Here" She said handing me a paper with her number scribbled in it. I don't quite get her. She won't give me her name but she gave me her phone number.

"Call me when she breaks your heart" She said smiling while she pointed at Sam who is now currently talking to a brunette guy and another blonde girl. I looked at them but when I turned back at 'the airplane girl', she was already on her way. I looked at the number in my hand and placed it inside my wallet. I then went running towards the group, thinking of an excuse for Sam for taking too long.

"Sam! God! It's hard to catch up on you! What if I get lost in here, what am I going to do?" I said catching my breath.

"I told you to hold your pee" Sam said rolling her eyes.

"I'm sorry that I can't help it when my bladder's full!" I replied defensively. The guy with a brunette hair gave me and Sam a confused look. Sam looked back at them.

"Uhm, guys this is Vic, Vic meet Freddie and Kaleen" I was contemplating on whether to shake their hands or wave or something, so I went with the wave and they waved back.

"So are you two—" Kaleen started.

"Do you want to hang out at the Groovie Smoothies?" Freddie then interrupted.

"Uhh Sure" Sam said a little confused. It was then as if she noticed something.

"Freddie" She said.

"Yeah?"

"Where's Carly?" she asked

"She's at Yakima, visiting her granddad but I guess she'll be home tomorrow or something" Kaleen replied with a smile.

"Oh, okay. Well, can you let us drop off our stuff in her house for awhile? I already texted her"

"Sure" Freddie replied. We took the cab going to the Bushwell Plaza. I looked at Freddie and Sam as we took the cab and I am pretty sure that those two have quite a history that I somehow can't wait to unfold. Hold on to your sit Vic, I guess you have a competition and it's on you to win or lose.

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**And we're clear.**

**That's it for this chapter I hope you enjoyed it. Do you mind telling me what you think about it? I am giving you the freedom to speak you mind! It's a free world baby!**


	11. Homecoming Regrets

**A/N: Hello everyone! I am back and I'm alive. hahaha. A lot of things got in the way of getting this posted but against all odds it's here anyway. LOL. I hope you'll like this. I hope you guys enjoy and have a great time reading this.**

**Disclaimer: This is a fanfiction. I do not own anything.**

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_Homecoming Regrets_

It's so confusing. Girls are so confusing. Sitting here at the middle of Kaleen and Sam makes it even more complicated. There's this new level of awkwardness between me and Sam. And Kaleen, don't even get me started with her. Since Sam came this morning she's been acting like she _likes _me. You know, like more than just a friend. I even have this strange feeling that she's been acting like she's my girlfriend once in awhile but I shrugged the feeling off because that's just ridiculous. I look at Sam whose smiling as she looked at the places she haven't seen in months. Her blue eyes were shinning with glimmer. I look in front and saw the man I am loathing at the moment. I mean, I know it was stupid to wait for her to come back expecting her not to fall for any other guy but me. I then look at Kaleen. I'm not quite sure about what I am feeling for her. I don't love her more than as a friend but sometimes I think of how life would be so much easier if I fell in love with her and not with this blonde-headed demon on the other side of me. The cab pulled over and we're here, in front of the Bushwell Plaza. Sam went down as fast as she could and smiled. She looked back at me and gave me a grin that I haven't seen not only in months but for a long time. I gave her a soft smile. I went out the cab and stood next to Sam.

"Welcome home" I said whispering. She looked at me and let off a smile

"It's good to be back" She replied. I went at the back of the cab to grab Sam's suitcase with Vic.

"Hey Freddie, its Freddie, right?" He asked. I nodded. I didn't really feel like talking to him. "How long have you known Sam?" He asked in a joyful tone.

"We've known each other since Sixth grade" I replied.

"Was she always that mean?" He asked.

"Trust me, 'mean' is an understatement" I said smiling as I put Sam's suitcase down. Sam then ran inside the Bushwell Plaza. I chuckled as we followed after her.

"LEWBERT!" We caught her screaming at the sleeping wart king. Lewbert shot his eyes up as he saw the demon he has dreaded to see.

"ARGH! You're back! ARGH!" Lewbert said as he went inside the room behind his desk.

"You're crazy!" I said laughing at Sam.

"And you miss my craziness, dorkward" She said as she went to the elevator and we followed after her. We reached the 8th floor and are currently standing infront of the Shay's door. Sam hesitated at first but then she decided to knock anyway. She was greeted by a rather energetic Spencer.

"Kiddo!" He said hugging Sam. Lifting her up. "I miss you!"

"You guys were always this close?" Kaleen asked leaning towards me. I can tell Vic was listening too.

"Yep" I said smiling.

"Why don't you put your bag upstairs" Spencer said pointing at Sam who nodded "And then we'll all go to Cheesecake Warehouse and eat the most gigantic cheesecake you will ever have!" He continued raising his hands up.

"Yeah!" We all replied.

* * *

**Sam's P.O.V**

What if? What if I was wrong? What if the right thing to do was not to leave? What if I didn't leave?

_What if?_

That's all there is, isn't it. I'm sitting here on the cab going to the Cheesecake Warehouse. If I didn't leave, Freddie won't be dating Kaleen and I wouldn't be here trying to bare every painful stab in my heart. It was so stupid to think that he would wait for my return. During the ride towards the Bushwell Plaza, I saw him look at Kaleen intently. And I know, I know that he's happy, that I am nothing but a complication, if not, a disturbance of their happy relationship. I look outside the window. This time I wasn't smiling. I look at all the things more closely and how much they've change over months. It's funny, how these things didn't matter before. Now, it's one of the obvious clues of how permanent change is, ironic isn't it.

"You okay, kiddo?" Spencer said looking at me from the front sit.

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just now that I've notice how much Seattle can change in a few months." I replied

"Like how much cleaner it is without you vandalizing the walls, probably crushing one's ego?" Freddie said smirking. I chuckled as I remembered something that I wrote about Freddie trust me you don't want to know

"It was two years ago, get over it Fredward" I replied smiling. You see, this is what I love. The fights, it reminds me of how happy we were and how contented we were before the break up fiasco. And it pains me how much I can't tell him how much I love this.

"Oh yeah, I haven't properly introduced you yet. Uhmm, this is Vic, Vic meet Spencer." I said and they shook hands.

I look outside once again as we went nearer to the place we're heading.

* * *

**Freddie's P.O.V**

We were all sitting on our chairs waiting for the cake made of cottage cheese, eggs and sugar baked in a pastry shell to come into our tables. Sam has introduced Vic to Spencer during the ride towards here. I was sitting beside Vic and Kaleen, beside Kaleen was Sam. We're all sitting in a big round table and we're all looking at each other awkwardly.

"So..." Spencer started but then was interrupted by a little girl.

"Sam? Freddie?" She looked at us back and forth making sure she was right. "Oh my gosh! It is you guys! ARE YOU BACK TOGETHER? I was so sad when iCarly went on hiatus! But Sam you're back and Freddie OMG! I gotta tell my grandma!" She said running out the place.

"You two dated?" Vic and Kaleen asked at the same time. Looks like we have a _lot _of explaining to do.

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**That's it. The end. end of story. bye.**

**lol jk. okay that was a lame joke but anyway, I hope you enjoyed this. And if you did, please press that button that'll make you review and tell me what you feel about this story. I accept nice and well written criticism. ;) now excuse me while I dance my lucky review dance!**


	12. Not Another Homecoming

**A/N: Hola mi amigas! LOL. Was that right? No? oh well. It's 12:08 in the morning and I still have classes tomorrow but since I owe you guys this chapter I am updating it tonight even though I am tired. Since I just finished my science report I figured why not post this. I finished this chapter even before Halloween but we had to go somewhere else and I didn't get the chance to update it before we left. Forgive me? XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly but I do own the OC in this story. :)**

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* * *

Not Another Homecoming_

**With Carly (Third Person P.O.V)**

She paced back and forth, worrying about how Sam and Freddie will handle this situation. She knows that this will drive them insane, the awkwardness and the tension. She knew Sam was going home today. She wasn't supposed to go home until tomorrow but now she's convincing her boyfriend, Matt, to drive her home. This visit to Yakima wasn't only for her granddad but to also introduce his boyfriend to her protective relatives. Although she loves how her relatives like Matt to the point that they don't want them to leave, she just has to because she knows how big the disaster she caused will be.

Yes, Sam and Freddie's meeting at their Airport was actually her fault. She told Freddie a week before Sam came. She begged Freddie not to tell Sam that she told him nor fetch her at the airport, but knowing Freddie's love for Sam, he would be chasing after her in the airport.

'_They're so going to kill each other' _she thought.

"Thank you for your time Sir, but we really have to go home now" Matt said putting their suitcases at the back of his Car. He got his licence a year ago and received his car as a gift from her parents for taking care of his little sister while they were gone.

"Thanks granddad! I'm going to visit you next summer!" she feels bad for leaving very early. She just visited him the other day, not attending to school to visit him early but now she has to leave early.

"I am really sorry" She continued looking at him apologetically. "I just really need to fix this mess I've created" she said. She hugged her grandpa and went inside the other side of the car. She waved her last goodbye, for now. They were now driving a two long hour drive from Yakima to Seattle. Carly was fidgeting in her sit while Matt held her hand for ease.

"Look, it's not your fault. You're just a friend trying to help, okay?" He said briefly looking at his girlfriend, smiling, then back to focus on the road.

"I love you" She said, sighing. She's so fortunate to have a guy like him to be there for her.

"Ditto" He replied. "So how bad are they?" He asked with a sneer.

"You know Emma and Chad right?" Carly said smiling.

"The Bickering couple?" He asked.

"Yeah them." She replied.

"They're like them?" He asked laughing a bit.

"Well, Emma and Chad are only using verbal brawls" She said looking at Matt. "Sam and Freddie are way worst"

"Well then, we have to get there fast" He said stepping harder on the gas laughing.

**Freddie's P.O.V**

"_You two dated?" Kaleen and Vic said at the same time. Oh boy. Looks like we have a looooooot of explaining to do._

I looked at Sam who was looking back at me. Man this is awkward. I mean, I thought Sam had told Vic since, you know, they're dating. We were both unsure what to tell them. We nodded at the same time.

"Kinda" I said at the same time she said "Sort of"

"What? When? How?" They asked again at the same time. I'm not sure what to say and I can tell so is Sam. Thank god for the perfect timing of cheesecake.

"Oh my gawd! These cheesecakes are gigantic" Vic said

"You mean huge?" Kaleen asked with her eyes all amused at the cakes in front of her.

"Yeah, GIGANTIC" I mentally sighed in relief. The topic was changed without even making an effort. I was so glad we didn't have to mingle with this topic any further because I honestly do not know what to say. I mean, my and Sam's relationship is not the easiest relationship to understand. I looked at Sam who was already digging into her cheesecake. I smiled. If Carly was here it'd be less awkward. I sighed and started digging in my cheesecake.

Suddenly I heard someone screaming Sam's name. Suddenly there was a brunette girl hugging a blonde girl. A messy haired guy with grey eyes followed after her.

"How'd it go brother? Did they hate you?" Kaleen asked her older by a year brother, Matt.

"Actually, it was the polar opposite. They find me irresistible!" He said playfully, grabbing Kaleen's fork, eating a piece of Kaleen's cake.

"So you must be Sam?" He said looking at Sam still chewing. Sam looked at him and raised her eyebrows. She looked at Carly and said;

"I'm sorry miss, I think you yelled the wrong name because I am not Sam" rolling her eyes and her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Okay, I get it" Matt chuckled. "I'm Matt, Carly's boyfriend and Kaleen's brother." He said shaking hands with Sam.

"Call me Sam"

"And you are?" Matt asked looking at Vic.

"Vic, Sam's..." He looked at Sam "...friend" I rolled my eyes. What's the point of trying to hide that they're dating. Is she scared that I might react in a sadistic way? I _will _get hurt. I _am _hurt. But she shouldn't keep this sort of thing from me. Even though it'll hurt me so much, I have to know. Although I am not a big part of her life anymore, I _was _a big part of her life then and I deserve to know what's happening around her now.

"I'm surprised that none of you are dead. And, oh, I can see you're jealous of Vic" Carly said, whispering in my ears as she passed by me and then proceeded to hug Spencer.

"I am not!" I said involuntarily. They all looked at me with weird looks except Carly who was leering.

"Going to finish this cheesecake, I am so full" I said continuing my previous yelp.

"Ahhh" They said.

"How about I'll tell the waiter will take this out and then you guys go to the Groovie Smoothies?" Spencer asked chuckling noticing that none of us will be finishing any of these cheesecakes. We all replied with nods. We all decided to walk since it was just 15 minutes away from the Cheesecake Warehouse. I was walking beside Sam, hoping I could talk to her in whole sentences without fighting.

"How are you? We haven't been, you know, in touch" I asked looking at her deep eyes of ocean.

"I've been fine, better even" She said smiling. I was contemplating to ask her – not sure if it was the right time or not – but I did ask her anyway.

"Have you found her?" I said looking deeper into her eyes as I drown in an ocean of blue. She looked away. She looked at the sky, at the ground, everywhere else but me. She exhaled heavily as she finally looked at me.

"Yes, but when I did, there was someone else." She said walking faster than me, leaving me behind. My heart was smashed into pieces. Just like before. It was as if I want to break down and cry.

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**okay. First, I just want to say, I'm sorry because I know most of you were expecting an intense conversation between Kaleen, Freddie, Sam, and Vic but for some reason I can't bring myself to write something intense just yet. So... tell me what you think about Carly dating Kaleen's brother? anyway write your comments, reactions, suggestions and drop it on the nearest review button you see on your window. lolwhut! sorry. I'm tired XD**


	13. Regretful Kisses

**A/N: Hola my friends! I am back with another chapter that I hope you would enjoy or like or... yeah you get the point. Anyway, this week is exam week so wish me luck! Oh and because of that I might not be updating fast but I'll try my best although I don't think I ever did update very fast XD. anyway I'll leave you reading... brb.**

**Disclaimer: Dan Shneider owns iCarly, If you think I am Dan, well you are mistaken. I do not own anything.**

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_Regretful Kisses_

It's been a week and Freddie Benson was still broken, crushed, shattered in a million pieces. He was sad yet he didn't let it show. Although he wasn't enthusiastic the whole week he still talks and laughs occasionally. It was as if there was this mask on his face making everyone thinks he's happy. And now, seven days later, here he is, sitting on my couch and I have no idea what to tell him.

"I'm sorry man, I don't know what to tell you" I said handing him a glass of water. He nodded. Shane was working at the hour and Jonah's on community service, and I'm not a person with a lot of wisdom unlike them.

"Why did you only say it now?" I asked.

"I don't know" He shrugged "Probably because I can't handle the pain anymore. I needed to tell someone. I'm sorry for pressuring you Gibs" He said.

"It's no problem" I replied. "Look, this isn't the best advice but... if that's true, if Sam is really dating that guy and she's happy, Freddie, you have to let her go. I know how much it will hurt you, but things happen for a reason and who knows? The right door might be just right in front of you. You will always love Sam. We all know that. The feelings you felt for her, it will always be there in your heart. And she will be your biggest what if. She will always be your first love. But what if there's a greater love out there for you? You have to take a risk Freddie" I continued.

He sighed.

He closed his eyes trying to find words, but instead the only thing that came out from his mouth was;

"Thanks Gibby" He said standing up walking towards the door. I looked at him with pitiful eyes and then he was out the door.

* * *

**FREDDIE'S POV**

What Gibby said made me think. What if he was right? Then I thought of Kaleen. I thought of the things I like about her. I've made a mental list about the things I like about Kaleen. I love her hair. I love her laugh. I love her bluntness. I love every single thing about her that reminds me of Sam. Kaleen's not like Sam however. She may be blunt, but kind enough to say sorry afterwards. Sam was full of pride. She wouldn't admit she's wrong unless she has no other choice. Kaleen's hair reminds me of Sam. Sam's eyes were piercing blue while Kaleen's was boring brown. I know my eyes are brown to but... you get the point. I walked not knowing where to go. I don't want to go home just yet. Seattle wasn't very cooperative though. It started pouring hard. I cursed. I ran towards a building. It was familiar and I have noticed it was Kaleen's apartment building. I walked inside and buzz on their room.

"Who's this?" Her soft voice can be heard from the speaker.

"It's Freddie" I sniffed "I'm cold"

"Dear heavens! Freddie what were you doing outside without an umbrella" She said frantically "C'mon up!" She continued. I went to their apartment and she was already outside waiting with a towel in her hand. You see if this was Sam, she'll probably still be inside her house. Like that one time...

**_Flashback_**

"_Sam!" I said banging on their house door. I was at the store near their house buying some stuffs for my math project when I realized I don't have enough money to pay for it so I had to go home and get some more money but before I could even reach the shop the rain started pouring hard. So I ran to the nearest house I know, my girlfriend's house. I know she's at the living room since I can see the television's reflection from the outside and I knew she was teasing me by not letting me in. A few seconds, maybe a minute, later she opened the door smirking. I shivered while sniffing with cold. _

"_I-I'm c-cold" I said shivering._

"_C'mere" She said hugging me "Fredamame needs some body warmth" I hugged her back not minding if I'm wetting her t-shirt, good thing she wasn't wearing white. She then wrapped her arms around my neck and then kissed me. After the tonsil tennis, she handed me a towel and told me to go and take a shower. I have some clothes at the back of her closet just in case of emergency like this but Sam always prefers to stay as far away from home. Her mom wasn't what she thinks she was. She wasn't that bad. Mrs. Puckett or what she prefers to be called as, Pam. Although I have been given the privilege to call her Marie (only a handful of people call her that. Only the ones that she's really close to). I took a shower and changed my clothes and went downstairs and there was Sam with a hot bowl of chowder. She was already eating almost all of it but she still asked me to finish the rest for her. _

"_I don't want to make out with a sick person" She said looking at me with fake disgust and I laughed._

**_End of flashback_**

Kaleen wrapped the towel around my shoulder and led me the couch. I don't know what to do. I feel so hopeless. We sat on the couch and did something I didn't think I would do. I cried, for the first time in a long time, I cried. Tears flew down my face.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"I- I—it hurts. I still love her... And it hurts that I know she's happy. That I can't be the one she can be with. I just—I don't—I" Before I could even finish the sentence a burning sensation was felt in my face. I looked up and her eyes were verge to tears. I don't know what happened but in an instant I knew that I hurt her.

"How stupid can you be?" She yelled. "Can't you see? I love you! I always have. Are you really stupid or you really are just so oblivious about everything around you because all you think about is yourself? Can't you see I am right here? I was always here! RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!" She continued, poking her hands on my chest. I didn't know what to tell her. Maybe I was too absorbed with my own problems to actually care about those people who love me. I was struck. I tried saying something but nothing came out of my mouth. She then did something that shocked me the most. She _kissed _me. I was too shocked to move.

Her lips were against mine. She tried deepening the kiss. I sat still without doing anything. And then I thought about what she said. And I did something horrible, something I regret, I kissed her back. My hands started holding her face and just then Sam came into the room.

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**yeah, I'll probably leave you there hanging. Lol, no? Not even a little hanging feeling there? Really? None at all? *grumbles* fine. Leave a review then.**


	14. Reality Nightmares

**A/N: I actually did love writing this and I am quite proud of how this chapter turned out. I didn't have a plan for this chapter. Nothing at all. I just let my hands type what I wanted this chapter to feel like if I saw someone I love(romantically) kissing another person and then ideas came and this happened. XD Oh and another trivia. This chapter is entitled "Reality Nightmare" and I actually don't have any idea why. I named the chapter that way because it sounds good. well for me it does.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly because if I did, iStart a fanwar wouldn't happen the way it did (although personally I found the episode funny and entertaining and I was pretty sure that no shippings will be revealed by the end of the episode so yeah)**

**November 26, 2010**

**I accidentally deleted it instead of only replacing the chapter. Curse my carelessness and impulse on clicking and clicking. So uhmm... I have edited a few parts and yeah... :) enjoy**

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_Reality Nightmares_

She just saw her worst nightmare turned into a reality. She just saw her world taken away from her. She just saw the very thing that would crush her to the core. Sam just saw Freddie kissing another girl and all she said was 'oh'. A lump was formed in her throat. _No, not now, please not now. _ She begged herself to stop even before she could verge into tears.

"Oh" She said one more time, this time with a higher pitch as if she just realized something. She faked a smiled.

"I'm sorry was I disturbing something?" She asked forcing a smile on her face as if she was happy to see them kissing. Freddie, however, has his back before Sam, not even bothering to face her. What would he say anyway? It doesn't matter. Whatever word that would come out of his mouth won't have any effect on her now. _She's probably even happy I've 'moved on'. _So he didn't face her although he can very well see Kaleen's reaction was stuck between not knowing whether she should say anything or just remain silent.

"No, It's okay" Sam said noticing the awkwardness. She smiled. You see, Sam is a con artist. The best one in Seattle. She's used to this. She's used to pretending she was fine when she's not. But this one is completely different, it's the person she cares the most. There was nothing she can do. This was all her fault. These are the consequences of her actions and she should face it.

"I just, I gotta go. I know we're supposed to hang out but I came here to tell you I have to go somewhere else" She said making up an excuse to leave this hell on earth.

"Maybe next time" She continued. She looked at Freddie this time, who was still not facing her.

"Freddie" She said in a softer tone. Freddie, finally, looked at her. Her eyes directly shooting his heart giving him a slight shock. He can't help but notice something odd with them. It was as if he stared at nothing. Her eyes were dull and blanked but her lips were smiling. It was as if he wasn't looking at Sam at all. He ignored the cold feeling that went up his spine and said

"Hmm?"

"Nothing" She replied. "Just making sure it was you" Sam said proceeding toward the door. Knowing she was out of sight she felt that lump on her throat coming back and this time she didn't plead. She just let those tears escaped her eyes. She mentally cursed herself. She was Sam Puckett for god's sake. She shouldn't be crying over a boy who chose someone over her. Damn, she deserved someone better, or at least that's what she's forcing herself to think because deep down her heart, she thinks she does not deserve anyone like Freddie at all. It was the first time she didn't regret leaving, it was as if the thing she regretted the most was returning. She regretted going home.

She was convinced that the universe is conspiring against them. Sam is not a big fan of crying, but she let those tears flow down her face. _This is so stupid. _She told herself but she didn't stop crying. She never liked crying but she didn't stop crying when Freddie and her broke up. She didn't stop crying when she was on the plane leaving from Seattle. She didn't stop crying now, a proof that beneath those tough exterior lays the soft side of Sam. And For once, Samantha Puckett was lost. She didn't know where to hang on because the only thing that she was gripping on had let her go. It wasn't long until she bumped into someone. She never really looked at where she was going. Tears were still visible on her face. _Dammit. _She thought. She never wanted anyone to see her crying unless it's Carly and thank god, it was.

"Sam? What happened?" Carly asked with a worried look. What could possibly happen so fast that made her cry like this? She just went back to trace her steps looking for her lost earring and now she's crying so suddenly. Sam shook her head begging that she didn't want to talk about it. She hugged her best friend in need of comfort. This was not good. She saw her cry, but this was her worst shed of tears. Whatever happened in there, it was something big and Sam couldn't take it anymore.

"Look, if you want to stay in my place-" Carly started.

Sam shook her head in disapproval. She doesn't want to be near Freddie at all. Staying at the Shay's apartment would be worst if he suddenly comes in bursting through the door. Carly nodded.

"How about if I stay at your place?" She asked knowing her friend needed someone to comfort her. Although Sam's mom is perfectly capable, Carly knows that her conscience will keep on bugging her as long as she's with her friend. Sam sniffed and wiped her tears.

"No, I'm perfectly fine. And besides I'm Sam Puckett remember?" She smiled. Carly sighed knowing that Sam will never let her come.

"Can you at least tell me what happened?" Carly asked. Sam, once again, felt those stabbing pain in her heart but this time she tried to control herself and not cry about it. She contemplated on choosing between telling her and not telling her. She was her best friend after all. Nevertheless, having Carly as your best friend has its own consequences. If she told her right here and right now, she'll probably go and confront Kaleen about it. Or maybe she'll go hysterical and start crying. It will probably cause a fight between her and her boyfriend Matt. Sam didn't want to take the risk but Carly's eyes were begging for information and she couldn't just resist.

"It's going to sound stupid" Sam started as Carly raised her eyebrow. Sam sighed "I saw Kaleen and Freddie kissing and I know they're dating but seeing them actually kissing makes my heart break because I'm still not over Freddie" The girl in question replied as fast as she could hoping Carly wouldn't catch it.

"Kaleen and Freddie kissed?" This confused Carly even more. She knows they were never dating. _So why were they kissing? _The brunette thought. Her eyes widened. _Oh MY GOD THAT BITCH!_ Another thought passed into her head, finally making a conclusion that Kaleen called the both of them to "hang out" just so they can see her lip locking with their best friend.

"Carly, please, don't go overboard. They have every right! It's just a bad timing!" Sam defended knowing that Carly would be thinking about the worst things

"OH please, don't be insensitive, Sam" Carly replied "We all know that she planned this. Of all the people, I thought you would've sensed that" Carly was aggravated.

"Carly! It's your boyfriend's sister we're talking about here!" Sam replied "Look, I'm going home and please. For the first time I am going to tell you this and I hope you listen very carefully and follow my instruction; don't do anything stupid. Alright Carls?" Sam said. Carly nodded and Sam went home with an umbrella in her hand. Just then she saw Matt entering the building. He has a curious look on his face.

"What happened to Sam? Her eyes look so puffy." He asked.

"I don't know. Ask your sister, but she probably won't hear you because she's too busy eating the face of my best friend." She said in a mean and irritated tone.

"You mean, Kaleen is kissing Freddie? And Sam's crying about it?" He asked not sure if what he heard was right. It doesn't sound like something his sister would do. For all he knows, she was an innocent young girl falling in love with her childhood friend. He knows she liked Freddie a lot but he didn't entertain her much because he knew about Sam.

"Yes, It was a part of your sister's devious plan" Carly said. Now that really hit Matt, hard. It was his sister and no matter how much he loved this girl right in front of her, he wouldn't allow her sister to be talked about that way. He loved his sister and he loves Carly too. He was so shocked by the words that went out of her mouth he didn't had the time to control his anger.

"Her plan? Oh, you think she planned lip locking with Freddie just before Sam came in?" He shouted

"She was hurt!" Carly replied

"Screw her! You think my sister wasn't hurt? She also liked Freddie! For goodness sake Sam left! Now her chance is gone and my sister deserves to be happy!" He replied screaming.

"And Sam doesn't?" Carly said calming her voice tears were forming in her eyes. "That's what you think huh?" She continued biting her lip. She considered Sam as her sister and she hated hearing those things about Sam like Matt did when she told her Kaleen was a devious girl. It's like fangs were burying within her chest as she prevents herself from crying.

"Carly, I didn't—" He wasn't given the chance to explain

"Save it" Carly said. She walked out the door. Footsteps can be heard behind her. She silently hoped it was Matt. But of course, it was getting cliché that it wasn't

"Hey! I asked the front desk if someone had reported a missing earring and turns out you have! So, um… Here's your missing earring" She smiled with her blue eyes beaming at night. She looked the same age as mine.

"Thanks! What's your name?" She asked to formally thank her. She smiled once again

"Just call me 'The girl who gave you your earring back'" She smiled going back inside the building. Her black hair and purple highlights were swaying with the breeze.

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**There you go people. I hope you appreciated my efforts for I have enjoyed writing the entire chapter indeed. I sincerely hope that you enjoy it as much as I do. Oh and have you watch harry potter 7? OHMYGAWD IT WAS AMAZING! and sad :( it's a big part of my childhood. However if you don't want the death eaters coming to your home cruciating you, I suggest you review or 'He-who-must-not-be-named' will come back and teach you a lesson.**


	15. The Aftermath

**A/N: Some of you may know by now my excuse of not being able to update this story right on schedule but for some of you who did not know, it's because I have lost a loved one. But I'm all better now and I really did my best to write this despite of my busy schedule and I am deeply sorry if I do not satisfy you with this.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly.**

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_The Aftermath_

The rain was falling very hard as I gripped on my umbrella tighter. I tried my best not to cry anymore. I walked as fast as I could. I just wanted to reach home already. I wanted to lie on my bed and go to sleep, to pretend that today was all a dream when I wake up tomorrow. I just want to leave this day behind. Forget it like it never happened. I went to the house smelling something being cook.

"Sam! You didn't tell me Vic could cook" My mom said as soon as I entered the door. I bit my lip and nodded. I then ran in to my room and locked the door. I heard my mom said something but I didn't quite make it out since all I heard are my own sobs. I heard footsteps going up the stairs. I looked briefly at the door waiting for a knock. I honestly don't want to be alone. I want Vic to try and comfort me. I want my mom to come bursting at the door asking me what happened. At the same time, I feel like I'd rather be alone. I don't want anyone to see me cry. I heard a knock at the door. As certain as I was that no one could read minds, I was stunned as I heard someone's voice behind the door.

"Look, I know you would rather be alone right now. I know you don't ever want anyone to see you cry but if you're ready to talk I'll be right outside the door." A voice I was certain that belonged to Vic. I bit my lip and opened the door. I looked at him and went for a hug. I hugged him tightly as tears poured down from my eyes. He patted my head. I can't believe it. Here I am, acting like a child over something that I should have accepted when I decided to leave.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked. I shook my head. I didn't want to talk about it now. Right now, all I want to do is cry. It's nothing like me, but crying is good once in a while. He nodded while I cry on his shirt. He led me inside and sat me on my bed. Suddenly, I felt like I had to tell someone, like I had to release some emotion. So I told him what happened. I told him about the kiss and how I should not have felt something about it but I did.

"I should have not come back. I should've just left them alone" I said sobbing in his shirt.

"Look at me, I'm weak!" I added looking at him wiping my tears.

"Sam, you're not weak. Crying is not a sign of weakness. Sometimes you've been strong for too long" Vic said "And do not regret leaving. If you did not left you wouldn't have met an awesome guy like me" He continued. I chuckled and punched his arms. He smiled at me and I can't help thinking and wishing that he was the one I fell in love with. I'm not blind, I can see how much he has done for me and not once have I given back any of those favours. I love Vic as my brother. He's one of the few guys I can trust. He's like my brother and that's it. I sometimes wish that one day I'll just fall for him and then life would be easier. Life would be like those sappy chick flicks where they fall in love and then bam! They're together forever. Unluckily, I wasn't given that life. Fate has given me something harder to face probably because fate, for some reason, hates me. I looked at Vic's eyes deciding to speak what was on my mind.

"I really wished it was you. I wish that my heart chose you." I said.

"But it didn't. It chose Freddie. And that's why you're here, right? To get him back and not to lose him." He said

"But it's too late, he's dating Kaleen" I replied.

"Your romantic relationship is not the only thing that I meant" Vic said confusing me further. "You can still be the close friends, like before. Just because you've lost him as your lover doesn't mean that you should lose him as your best bud" He continued. I smiled. He was right. I haven't been really talking to Freddie. Everything just seems so awkward after that night in the cheesecake factory. I don't really remember talking to him like before since we got here. I felt Vic's hands holding my face. He placed his forehead against mine.

"Sam, I love you and you know that. I want you to be happy and if it's with him you're happy then I'd be glad to give you away. Your heart chose him for a reason and mine chose you and it's true that someday, if ever you get over him, I wish that you'd fall in love with me." He said then proceeding to kiss my forehead. I nodded.

"Thank you." I said smiling at him "Really _really, _Thank you"

"Go to sleep" He said. I nodded as I fell into a dreamless sleep.

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**Kaleen's P.O.V**

I wasn't sure if Sam was okay with this. Well, it's probably because I was kissing her ex-boyfriend. Who am I kidding? It is of course because of me kissing her ex-boyfriend. I mean I would understand how awkward the situation is.

"Well that was awkward." I said interrupting the silence.

"Yeah." He replied silently.

"Look, I'm sorry I kissed you" I said. I mean, it felt good and I wasn't sorry at all, I liked the kiss and I didn't even know Freddie was coming over. I'm not the one controlling the weather in the whole world or Seattle for that matter. But somehow, I felt the need to say sorry. I'm not even sure if he felt the same way but if he didn't, why did he kissed me back? He must've felt something for me right?

"No, its fine... better even" He said and I smiled but there was something in his eyes that bothered me. I shrugged it off. It's probably just shock of everything happening so fast.

"So? Where does this leave us?" I asked "Be my boyfriend?" I continued. I don't know but it just slipped out of my mouth. I can see he was taken aback. I bit my lip.

"I don't see why not." He smiled. I looked at him and as I was just about to lean my face to his, I heard the door opened.

"Freddie, this is going to sound rude but I'm going to say it anyway, get out of my place. NOW!" My furious brother said. I narrowed my eyes at him. Why was he so irate? Freddie looked at me and he shrugged. He nodded and he quickly went out kissing my cheek before doing so.

"So it's true?" Matt said. He was so enraged I can almost imagine smokes coming out from his ear.

"What?" I asked bewildered.

"Tell me did you plan all this? Did you plan on Sam seeing you kissing Freddie?" He asked yelling so hard that I was scared the neighbours might hear it. And then a felt of anger rushed inside me. How dare he? He's my brother and I cannot believe he would think so lowly of me, I'm his sister and he knows that I would never do such a thing even how much I love the person. He knows that, or at least he should know that! I was so enraged I did the last thing I would have done to my brother. I slapped him.

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**So that's it for now. I'm sorry if you find this crappy. I didn't have time to edit it properly. Oh and please click that little button that asks you to review if it isn't such a waste of your time. Thank you.**


	16. The Aftermath Of The Aftermath

**A/N: oh my gawd! I am so sorry! This has been in my document manager for the past 10.. 11 days? I thought I uploaded it before I left! I am so sorry! Here it is anyway.**

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**With Freddie (Third Person's POV)**

_Everything's supposed to be fine, right? _

That's what Freddie kept asking himself. Everything was supposed to be fine. It shouldn't be all damn confusing. He's now dating Kaleen but it sure doesn't feel like he is. He keeps on telling and telling and telling himself that it's Kaleen who he likes now but he can't help but think about the one person he shouldn't be feeling that way. _Sam. _

He was pathetic, or at least that is what he says every time he thinks of her and not _her. _He should be concerned about Kaleen right now. He had no idea why Matt was so furious but the problem is that it didn't bother him, that he was more concerned about Sam seeing him and Kaleen kiss. He sighed.

But Sam does not love him now, she loves someone else. He has to move on. He can't help but feel guilty. He feels like he was using Kaleen. Being stupid, he thought he can teach his heart how and who to love. And that's what he was trying to do.

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**Kaleen's POV**

I hate having a sibling, well, not most of the times but right now, yeah, I hate my brother. You know how at one moment you feel so happy that nothing can bring you down and then this thing, this person, comes along and destroys everything. Well that thing, that monster of the moment, is my brother. He's the reason I can't sleep tonight. Great. Instead of not being able to sleep because I'm so in love and the continuous tingling of the lips from the kiss, or the butterflies in the stomach, or whatever teenage movie like stuff that most of the time happens at night which cause the inability to sleep, I, of all the people who should be really happy right now, am sinking very low. AND IT'S BECAUSE OF MY BROTHER.

I don't even regret slapping him. I feel great about it. He deserves it anyway. I can still hear the television from the living room. Screw this. I'm talking to him because he's been a damn asshole. I stood up from my bed and walked towards the door which is directly beside the living room. We live in a flat, you see. I crossed my arms as I look at my brother watching the television intently with a pack of frozen peas at the side of his face that I slapped. Man, did I slap him hard?

"Hey" I said coldly.

"Hey, Kaleen, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said—don't give me that look—I know I shouldn't have said what I said. I really am sorry and I am happy for you" Matt replied.

"You know I can't stay mad at you. But you're cooking breakfast tomorrow" I replied smirking

"Promise" He replied "You know you really slapped me hard" He continued. I walked towards him and sat beside him.

"I'm sorry" This time I knew I was the one who's supposed to say sorry. "But you deserved it anyway" I added.

"So all in all; you're still not really sorry" He replied.

"Yep" I said going back to bed. And now I cannot sleep, and it's because of another reason, the good reason. Damn, I look like a love sick puppy. It's too good to be true. I feel like flying and other romantic crap. Somehow I feel like Freddie isn't thinking of the same thing tonight but then again it's just my anxiety talking. The good thing is that Sam's fine with it, or at least I think she is. It's probably Carly who's freaking out right now, besides she was the one who got so angry when I first talked to Freddie. Oh _shit. _Carly! That's why my brother was so angry. I jumped out of my bed and ran towards the door.

"Carly" was all I managed to say.

"You figured it out or did she talk to you?" He asked looking concerned.

"I figured it out. Are you two –?" I can't even finish the sentence myself. Gawd, I wonder how he feels.

"Over?" He asked. I nodded. "Well, she never said 'we're done' so I take that as a good sign that we're not over" He replied. I sighed with relief.

"It's not your fault Kaleen" He said "It was just bad timing" he continued.

"Okay" I replied. I kissed his cheeks and went to bed. Unexpectedly I fell asleep as soon as I crashed into the bed. And that night I dreamt about me and Freddie.

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**I'm so sorry if this doesn't satisfy you. I really am just having a major writer's block in this story and I hate it because there's another story line in my head that I want to start writing but want to finish this too! I want to finish this badly quite honestly but I really am having a writer's block.**

**Anyway. I was gone for almost 11 days for some kind of leadership training and then I was also one of the journalists to represent my school and guess what? I won a bronze medal for editorial writing! I know it's not that big of a thing cause most of you have probably won gold medals or silver and stuff but this was a really big thing to me. Especially because it was my first time writing an editorial and I was only chosen by chance because we lack contestants. Anyway. Leave a review?**


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